What Leadership is not about.

image credits: https://www.learningwithbiz.com/

Leadership begins from a place of empathy, empowerment, and persuasiveness.

What Leadership is not about? Traits that obstruct conversations, attack self-esteem and threaten to destroy psychological safety.

Leadership is not about —

• gaslighting, masked as “giving out new challenges”
• using 1:1s to assign tasks instead of making them about guidance, coaching, support, and discussing career goals
• micromanaging to cover up personal insecurities
• shifting stress downstream
• disagreeing in a way that discourages collaboration
• sharing feedback that’s not constructive
• not willing to let go of decision-making
• not finding faith in new processes
• not recognising that an introduced change takes time
• not knowing that change management is hard
• constant cross-examining in conversations to build a sense of ambiguity and false urgency
• starting 1:1 conversations with stressors
• hiring smart people, only to expect them to fall in line with how you want things to be

If you are doing any of these as a leader in your organisation, then you are failing as one.

Some helpful resources —

• The purpose of 1:1 (one-on-one) meetings — with example questions: https://www.leapsome.com/blog/meeting-with-purpose-the-unique-benefits-of-1-on-1-meetings
• The Hard Side of Change Management — https://hbr.org/2005/10/the-hard-side-of-change-management#:~:text=Managing%20change%20is%20tough%2C%20but,probably%20get%20five%20different%20answers.
• Tips to share constructive feedback: https://www.uptech.team/blog/12-tips-how-to-share-constructive-feedback
• How to Delegate Effectively: https://online.hbs.edu/blog/post/how-to-delegate-effectively
• Empathy Is The Most Important Leadership Skill: https://www.forbes.com/sites/tracybrower/2021/09/19/empathy-is-the-most-important-leadership-skill-according-to-research/?sh=162a907a3dc5
• Gaslighters at work: https://www.careercontessa.com/advice/gaslighting-in-the-office/
• How to survive a gaslighting boss: https://www.theladders.com/career-advice/its-not-you-its-them-how-to-survive-a-gaslighting-boss